Ugh.. This sucks. I'm exhausted, and all I can think about is wondering how the hell I am going to pay my rent along with bills and eating. It's a little sick that eating is the first thing I can scale back on without financial turmoil to follow, let's not mention health consequences. I find myself wondering how many days in a row I can eat oatmeal 3 meals a day, or afford a 6" sandwich from subway. I haven't eaten a vegetable in days, and god knows I'll probably get fat due to zero time to exercise. Also, the shittiest food imaginable is also the cheapest, so if I get really hungry and need a "meal" for $3, that may be my only option.
I'm also too exhausted and pissed/depressed to make good use of my time today as I sit agenda-less at FP. And the neighborhood is getting to me. I can't walk down the street without seeming to upset someone for my mere presence. I can't afford to do the laundry either. And, my school loans are a fucking trap and require me to make a payment due to slow "processing time" in my deferment papers, but I guess I wasn't looking for someone to be reasonable in THAT department. This sucks. It's 4 weeks in and I already am burned out. The real work hasn't even started to get going yet. But I said I was going to do this, so I guess I just have to be miserable for the next two years. Miserable and broke.
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